2026年8月24日月曜日

Diane Girdles the Globe


 


Diane Girdles the Globe


 





(maid12b.png)


 





(biker106.jpg)


Subj:I'll wear a helmet


next time I ride in London.


From: diane@vancouver.ca
To: barclay1720@aol.com
Date: Thu, Apr 12, 2012 8:29 pm
Pacific Daylight Saving Time


Hello, Kato!


I read the following story.



(biker303.jpg)


■"Biker Babe"


(Thur. April 12, 2012)


If I knew I was going to go riding in London, I definitely would have brought a helmet... oh, well, at least I brought my underwear!
I really enjoyed Himiko's monologue.



【Himiko's Monologue】



 


I'm a biker babe, too.
You don't believe me, do you?


Well... I don't drive a bike.
But, I like to go for a ride on a bike.


How?... you may ask.


Well...I'm always a piggyback rider like this:



(biker012.jpg)


But, the other day when I went for a ride on the bike my cousin was driving, the cop in the picture stopped us.
At first I didn't know why he stopped us.
You may wonder if I was wearing no panties.
Of course, I did wear a string bikini bottom.
But the problem wasn't my panties but a helmet.


So whenever you ride a bike piggyback, you'd better wear a helmet, too.
Otherwise, you'd get a ticket and pay a fine.


I hope Kato will write another interesting article soon.
So please come back to see me.


Have a nice day!
Bye bye ...




This was too funny.
Thanks for sending it.


 



 


It was good to see you on Tuesday.
We had an amazing yoga class.
A girlfriend from my building joined me.


 



 


She is a lovely gal who used to be a grade school teacher and yoga teacher on the side.
She thought it was wonderful, too.
We both just about floated home; we were so relaxed.
... too bad we can't hold on to that feeling, eh kiddo?
One day you'll have to join us.


Anyway, you are such a storyteller, kiddo.



Love, Diane ~




Kato, what do you mean by "Diane girdles the globe"?



Do you have any idea?


Well..., I went over to London, and now I'm back here in Vancouver, but I don't think I've ever circled the world.


You haven't covered the whole world, but you've almost covered the globe through my readers.


...trotted over this earth through your readers? ...  What's that supposed to mean, Kato?


Diane, take a look at the following chart.


 



(wp20421.gif)


 



This is a list showing the number of page views visitors made on my following blog site:


https://denmanblog2.wordpress.com/



So, you're saying that those Net surfers came from the above 48 countries, aren't you?


Yes, I am.


You told me the other day that you've got several other blogs.


Yes, I have.  To be exact, I've got eighteen blogs and one website as follows.



(denmansyn.gif)



So, you call those sites "Denman Syndicate," don't you?



Yes, I do.  You see, Diane...you haven't met those visitors from the 48 countries, but they virtually met you and imagined you as the following pictures:


 



(biker106.jpg)



(biker105.jpg)



(biker203.jpg)


 



 



So, in a sense, you visited the above 48 countries and met each one of the readers... I mean, virtually. That's the reason I said you almost covered the whole earth---that is, you girdled the globe.



I see.  I wish I could meet each one of those visitors...must be a lot of fun!


Yes, I'd say so.  They seem to have really enjoyed your story.


Which story?


Here it is.





Subj:Summer is here


with us!


Enjoy the sunshine!



From: diane03760@vancouver.ca
To: barclay1720@aol.com
Date: Tue, Jul 26, 2011 4:35 pm.
Pacific Daylight Saving Time


Thanks, my truly skinny Socrates, Kato.



"Madame Riviera and Burger"


(July 26, 2011)


I've read the above article.
Your article is excellent as usual.
I did remember that you lived in Yellowknife some years ago.


 




 


Many years ago, I too lived for six months or so in the north, Whitehorse, Yukon Territory.


 



 


Actually, I worked for a mining company in a small town called Faro (Anvil Mines at the time) as secretary to the president.
I was given my own apartment (most of the staff had to live in bunk houses) and a huge salary compared with what I would receive in Vancouver.
So I was thrilled about that.


I didn't want to feel totally isolated, though, so I asked whether I could eat with the others in thecookhouse, and they obliged.


Thank God.
It was fun and much easier than doing my own cooking and making do with the limited selection in the local store.
The cook took a special liking to me, and every day he would give me extra rations of cookies and cakes.


Pretty soon I realized that if I took advantage of these favours I would end up being a roly-poly.


&nbp;



 


So I would take them and then give them away.
Lotsa fun.


I do remember a really cute Japanese gal who worked up there telling me she had already gained 25 lbs in one year, and it showed.


 



 


It was all the lesson I needed, thankfully.




SOURCE: "Biker Babe"
(Thur. April 12, 2012)


 



But, Kato, I wonder how they could find the article that includes my story.



It's quite easy.  By now, so many net surfers know your name. They simply search on GOOGLE, entering your name like this:



(gog20415di.gif)



Wow!...amazing!...249,000,000 hits, and my name appears in the third as well as the fourth article.



So I told you.  You're really getting popular among Net surfers.


I doubt... but how come your articles show up in the first page?


Well... as I told you, I've got many sites.



(hg20324ce.gif)



You see... The number of visitors is increasing month by month since I'm working as hard as possible to write interesting stories.  Besides, Diane, you're helping me a great deal, writing me many pieces of interesting mail and giving me tons of inspiration.  This is such a lovely collaboration, I'd say.



I'm glad to hear that, but since your readers are mostly Japanese, I don't think they appreciate my stories.


Oh yes, they do.  They're really looking forward to reading your stories.


What makes you think so, Kato?


Look at the following chart.



(ame20413be.gif)



From 8 to 9 o'clock in the morning, 40 visitors read "Biker Babe."



How do you know?


Look at the following snap shot of the article at http://ameblo.jp/barclay/.



(ame20413.gif)


 



Although I posted it in Vancouver at 4:27 p.m. on April 12, this article was published at 8:27 a.m. on April 13 in Tokyo because Japan is 16 hours ahead of us.



So what?


Diane, look at the peak time of the above chart.


Suddenly 40 people read the above article from 8 to 9.


Yes, yes, yes, ... they did because they were waiting for something exciting.  They knew that an article about Diane was about to come at any moment.  As soon as their RSS reader received the notice of the arrival of "Biker Babe," they clicked its title and started reading eagerly.


I don't believe that.


Why not?


There is no way for them to know that an article about me is coming along.


Well...the Japanese are quite ingenious, you know.   They're very keen to use a gadget like a RSS reader so that they can read whatever they want.


But they will never know what's in store.


Those 40 people were quite eager to read an article about you.


But not many Japanese speak English in the first place.


No, not many.  That's absolutely true, but they can read books in English or any written materials in English. Believe me, the Japanese have been learning English since grade 7.  They don't want to speak English, but they can read the language.


Kato, are you saying that they are particularly interested in "Biker Babe"?


Yes, I am.


Why is that?


...'Cause your story is iinteresting, and Himiko's monologue is quite funny.  So, word of mouth spread like wildfire in the dried-up forest.


Show me some proof.


If you say so, please take a look at the following list.



(ame20415en.gif)



This is the list of page views ranking on April 15, two days after the posting of "Biker Babe."  Except for RSS feed (rss20.xml), "Biker Babe" is still at the top of the ranking.



I see...


You see, Diane, you're quite popular among the Net surfers in Japan.  So, go to Tokyo, instead of London.


Why?


...'Cause you could easily expect a red-carpet reception, and they would treat you as if the late Princess Di came to life. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ...



(2004fx.png)



【Himiko's Monologue】



 


Look at the search result for Diane's name!
249,000,000 hits!
I can hardly believe this.


Well..., suddenly I get curious, so I enter my own name into the GOOGLE engine.
What a surprise!
I cannot find my name.
There are so many entries about Princess Himiko of the ancient Japanese royal family.


I've got an idea: enter my name with Diane and Kato like this.



(gog20421hi.gif)


Yes! Oh yes!
All pages listed above are talking about me.
I'm now thoroughly satisfied.


Well... I hope Kato will write another interesting article soon.
So please come back to see me.


Have a nice day!
Bye bye ...






If you've got some time,


Please read one of the following articles:




Ramen Boom


from Korea


Omakase@Sushi


Crocodile Meat


Killer Floods


Climate of Doubt


Glory of Death


Big Mystery


Hitler and Trump


Hot October


2018 BC Ballot


Bach Collegium Japan



(dianesun.jpg)


Dolly the Sheep


Golden Shower


Cleopatra


Strange Love


Quartet


Unknown Tragedy


World War B.C.


Mystery of Dimension


Call Girl Mystery


Typhoon & Emperor


Popes@Spotlight


Fireflies


Richard III


Savage vs. Civilized





Hi, I'm June Adams.


 


Since Himiko-san entered her own name into the Google search engine, I also did a search by entering my own full name.



(gog20421ju.gif)


I'm quite surprised to know that there are so many women with the same name as I have.
There is even a deceased woman listed in the above result.
She died at the age of 83.
I wonder if I would be able to live to that age.
In any case, I was sort of relieved to see two pages in which Kato-san talked about me.


 



 




(sylvie122.jpg)



0 件のコメント:

コメントを投稿